Monday, June 15, 2009

It Has Begun

We love to show you the good things happening here at Sam's House but it can be equally interesting to hear about some of the "behind the scenes" developments as well.

Since we opened, Dinesh has been conferring with some other children's home directors, getting their advice for the years ahead. A recurring theme is that the challenges are just beginning. Our oldest is only 11, and Dinesh has been told many times that adolescence will bring all the same concerns and anxiety that teens everywhere encounter.

Case in point: Babit and Maya now flirt with each other constantly. Slapping, pushing, hitting, teasing--all the suave, understated techniques of early love. Dinesh and the didis have had some conversations with each of them separately to try and finesse the situation, and it's under close surveillance.

Which reminded me of something my biologist friend Pete Wyckoff had told me. He read an article that found, biologically-speaking, unless you know someone or have a relationship with before the age of 2, you have a much greater chance of developing amorous feelings for that person. Obviously our children don't have that relationship, so this will continue to be an issue as more of them come of age.

So the flirting brigade is just starting.

To resolve this matter, Dinesh belongs to a network of children's homes and they plan to increase their socializing so that the boys and girls will have more outlets for relationships that won't necessarily disrupt the home life.


r. said...

How does this typically work in Nepal? Do young adults pick their own mates or do the parents arrange marriages for them?

John said...
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John said...
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Jen and Chris said...

Good question. Traditionally, arranged marriages have been the norm, but nowadays most couples, in the cities at least, are "love matches."

Sometimes to satisfy all parties, young boys and girls will ask their parents to "arrange" the marriage with the person they're in love with.